First off let me start off by apologizing because I made a mistake. I took a hiatus, I didn’t post about it, I just kind of stopped writing here. I can give you all the reasons that this happened but it doesn’t matter what the reasons were, I just should have communicated that I wouldn’t be writing for awhile.
I wondered if I would get back to my blog. A part of me wondered if all this time I put into was really worth anything, I don’t get paid for it, I’m not sure if anyone really reads it, and now that I’ve lost my momentum, what’s the point?
See when I make mistakes or when things don’t turn out to be my idea of “successful” I run and hide. I avoid thinking about whatever I was working on because I feel ashamed it didn’t work and I start to distract myself with other things.
But here’s what I’m trying to learn. I am worthy enough to make mistakes. I am worthy enough to keep trying. I am worthy enough to do something I enjoy even if it doesn’t make a difference to anyone. I’m worthy enough simply because I am.
I wonder how many times as mothers we put ourselves down when we make mistakes, dismiss all of our efforts the minute we lose it and yell at our little ones, minimize the importance of our work in the home because it doesn’t bring in money, lather ourselves in guilt when we can’t “have it all.” How much time do we invest into making our children feel worthy while we demean ourselves and place ourselves inferior because of mistakes or judgments from others?
Here’s an important reminder- your worthiness does not lie within motherhood. It’s simply within you. It was there before you child was and there before you had a career. You’re worthy whether or not you pushed out a baby. Whether or not you have a degree. Whether or not you’re pretty, or patient, or penniless. You are worthy even when you yell, even when you feel like you want to get in the car and drive away forever, even when you’re not sure you’re doing your best. You’re worthiness is within you all the time, it’s up to you to realize it’s there and start owning it
When you recognize your worthiness so many positive things happen. You can –
- Take responsibility for mistakes without shame
- Pick yourself up and try again
- Ask for what you need and want
- Recognize the difference between a sacrifice of love and being a martyr
- Demand respect and recognition from others
- Give the best parts of yourself without fear of failure
- Realize what is not worth your time, energy, and effort
So when you feel yourself starting to tear yourself down with shame, insecurity, and fear remember- you are worthy, simply because you are. Now start acting like it.