There’s a lot out there on how to create a mom mission statement which I find so very important. Here’s a great post from the Stay At Home Mom Survival Guide on creating a mom mission statement. It’s a great way to reflect on your purpose and goals as a mother.
But what I’m also proposing is also having a “Mom Manifesto.” Unlike a mission statement let’s say a manifesto is a little more about what you will and won’t stand for as a mother and person. It’s a summary of the the shit you won’t take, the stuff you’re willing to put a lot on the line for, and most importantly the things you won’t let compromise you’re worth or the most important parts of your relationship with your children and family.
This means taking a deep dive into exploring who you truly are and how societal expectations of motherhood impact your ability to adhere to your authentic self. Basically if you’re like me and you allow a sanctimonious Facebook post make you think you’re an awful mother because your kids have some plastic Fisher Price toys this manifesto can help you get a grip. It’s something to read on those days the inner critic is ruling all your thoughts. It might sound angry, it might sound defensive but that’s okay. It’s simply something that is meant to ground you back into your authentic self, what you care about and what you know deep in your heart is best for your child, partner, and self.
So here are some prompts and sentence completions
As a person I am rotted in __________________. I connect with my children through _____________. I do not need ________________________ to feel validated as a worthy person.
As a mother I am rooted in ______________. I connect with my children through _______________. I do not need __________________ to feel validated as as worthy mother.
I will choose to ignore the voice of my inner critic who often tells me _________________________. I will remember that this is not true or important because __________________.
The most important thing I am modeling for my children is ____________. In order to do that I reject ___________________.
At the end of the day I can remind myself that _____________ is trivial and not important to the overall health and wellbeing of myself or my family.
I choose to radically love and honor myself by ________________________.
I choose to radically love and honor my children by ___________________.
I create joy in my live through ________________. I create joy in the life of my partner and children through ______________.
Pretend someone calls you to your face a bad person/mother. What would you say? How would you defend yourself? What evidence might you give?
What are your top 3 values that you want to raise your children with? How do you model these values?
When your children are grown what do you want them to say about you as mother? How will that be manifested in your daily actions now?
There are no rules here. No recommended word count. The most important thing is that your manifesto feels GOOD to say it. It feels TRUE to you. It’ll change over time. And some days negative thoughts and the expectations of others may really get to you. But let this be a good place to land.
We will be creating our own manifestos at our in person support group this Wednesday. I can’t wait to share some examples next week!